Personal: A Selection from Tony Hoagland’s Unincorporated Persons in the Late Honda Dynasty (2010)
Don’t take it personal, they said;
but I did, I took it all quite personal—
the breeze and the river and the color of the fields;
the price of grapefruit and stamps,
the wet hair of women in the rain—
and I cursed what hurt me
and I praised what gave me joy,
the most simple-minded of possible responses.
The government reminded me of my father,
with its deafness and its laws,
and the weather reminded me of my mom,
with her tropical squalls.
Enjoy it while you can, they said of Happiness
Think first, they said of Talk
Get over it, they said
at the School of Broken Hearts
but I couldn’t and I didn’t and I don’t
believe in the clean break;
I believe in the compound fracture
served with a sauce of dirty regret,
I believe in saying it all
and taking it all back
and saying it again for good measure
while the air fills up with I’m-Sorries
like wheeling birds
and the trees look seasick in the wind.
Oh life! Can you blame me
for making a scene?
You were that limousine, the moon
climbing an onramp of pearl grey cloud.
I was the dog, chained in some fool’s backyard:
barking and barking,
trying to convince everything else to wake up
and take it personal too.
—Tony Hoagland, “Personal,” Unincorporated Persons in the Late Honda Dynasty (2010)